Nice things happen when you cook up a batch of Benton’s bacon. Foremost, you get to eat those meaty, marbled strips beloved by gourmet chefs and other discerning consumers of salt-and-smoke-cured pork. Almost as good, the beguiling aroma of sizzling bacon permeates whatever clothes you’re wearing at the time.
A favorite T-shirt, for instance. Then, when you go out wearing that shirt, perhaps to the bank, an attractive stranger waiting in line with you might say, “Mmmm, do I smell bacon?”
“Not just bacon,” you’d smoothly reply. “Benton’s bacon.”
After repeat wearings and compliments, however, the shirt inevitably needs to be washed, and that irresistible bacon bouquet is rinsed into oblivion. Or is it? Not if your laundry supplies include Benton’s “smoke sheets,” a new product that sounds as improbable as it does intriguing.
To be clear, this really exists: Benton’s, the family-run smokehouse in Madisonville, Tennessee, known for peerless country hams and bacon, has added dryer sheets to its smoke-infused offerings.
Fun marketing stunt? Okay, sure. But don’t assume it’s the result of any laboratory artifice. In fact, reusable, organic cotton dryer sheets are hung in a netted ham sack in an actual Benton’s smokehouse for two full days, absorbing the same rich fragrance of hickory and applewood that envelops nearby rows of slabbed bacon. Afterward, they’re vacuum-sealed to preserve the scent and packed into handsome wooden boxes engraved with the Benton’s logo.
“We’ve been asked to smoke grain for breweries, corn for distilleries, and cocoa beans for chocolate bars,” says Darrell Benton, who recently assumed CEO duties from his country ham–guru father, Allan Benton. “I’d have to say this is the most unique thing we’ve smoked.”
Inspiration came from customers who purchased T-shirts at the on-site store and reported that a smoky aroma lingered through repeated washings. Some even called up and asked if their shirts could be “re-smoked.”
So what does dad think of the dryer sheets? “He’s a bit more on the practical side of things, so was a little taken aback,” Darrell admits. “But once we explained it, he loved the idea. He’s excited to see what people think of it.”
It’s important to note that tossing a Benton’s sheet into the dryer with a load of wet laundry isn’t exactly recommended. Instead, tuck a sheet into a spare drawer or shoebox with the apparel that you wish to bless with eau de Benton’s. Let it marinate for a few hours and you’ll be the best-smelling person at the next office party, PTA meeting, or baby christening.
For the sake of hard-hitting journalism and science, this reporter did run a wet T-shirt (and a pair of socks) through the dryer with a Benton’s sheet, and I can confirm that the “sachet” system lent a deeper smokiness. When I casually wandered around the house in the newly imbued garments, my kids accused me of scarfing all the bacon that I must have cooked before they woke up. (To be fair, I’ve done that before.) Preposterous explanation accepted, my daughter cautioned that I was setting myself up for pursuit by neighborhood dogs.
Available from bentonssmokedsheets.com, a $75 gift set includes ten Smoke Sheets, a Benton’s T-shirt, and three packs of Benton’s bacon. That last part is key, just in case you’re tempted to eat your shirt.
