Arts & Culture

Advice from Southern Fathers

In honor of Father’s Day, we asked you to share the best advice you ever got from your fathers, grandfathers, and even great-grandfathers. And you delivered with a wealth of paternal wisdom—some of it solemn, and some less so. (These are Southern dads, after all. A little color is to be expected. See: “Words are like toothbrushes—once you’ve used them, you can’t take them back,” courtesy of Bradley T. Hayes, from New Orleans.) But whether serious, silly, or somewhere in between, the advice clearly didn’t fall on deaf ears.

Thanks to all of you for sharing, and a very happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there.

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“The best day to plant a tree is today, or 30 years ago.”
Ron Gray, Birmingham, Alabama

“You can always tell a man by the way he shines his shoes.”
Paul Sharpe, Memphis, Tennessee

“I don’t care what you end up doing for a living. Just do something that makes you happy.”
Jerry Balance, Kenly, North Carolina

“Stupidity is its own reward.”
Tom Mentzer, Harpers Ferry, West Virginia

“The key to longevity is exercise and a daily cocktail.”
Carl Carlson, Jr., Greensboro, North Carolina

“It’s time to make a decision, even if it’s wrong.”
Robert “Pete” Holloway, Johnson City, Tennessee

“Always think ahead.”
David “Dink” Wendel Foerster, Jacksonville, Florida

“When hunting, make sure your sights are on the target before you pull the trigger.”
William Lesley Gibson, Ben Wheeler, Texas

“Every tub has to stand on its own bottom.”
Alonzo T. Ward, Nashville, Tennessee

“Do the right thing, then wait.”
Gene Irving, Kosciusko, Mississippi

“A bad day of fishing still beats a good day at work.”
Kent Barrow, Greenville, North Carolina

“There’s nothing to worry about. He puts his pants on the same way you do every morning: One leg at a time.”
William A. Griffith, Greenwood, South Carolina

“Don’t do a halfway job. You’re better than that.”
George Lowman, Levy County, Florida

“The harder you work, the luckier you get.”
Garland French, El Dorado, Arkansas

“Never assume anyone knows who you are, and humbly introduce yourself.”
Gary Eidson, Hobbs, New Mexico

“If you ever give a horse its head, you will never get it back!”
Jim Hayworth, High Point, North Carolina

“Honey, you can’t polish a turd.”
Harry L. Harsh, Williamsport, Maryland

“Not being informed to the highest degree of accuracy, I hesitate to articulate for fear of deviating from the true course of rectitude.”
Bob Sutton, Sr., Kingsland, Georgia

“In life, you will always find someone better looking than you, someone smarter than you, and someone more talented than you. Therefore, you can only strive to be the best that you can be.”
William Reuel Boone, Many, Louisiana

“Don’t let the bastards grind you down.”
Julian Killen Quattlebaum, Jr., Savannah, Georgia

“Stand up straight and smile.”
Barry Walker, Tupelo, Mississippi

“If you fall in a mud hole, climb out, clean up, and get on your way!”
Gilbert Morton, Independence, Virginia

“Life’s not fair, baby, and the sooner you realize that, the better off you will be.”
Stanley Wilkins, Acworth, Georgia

“Be kind to your brother.”
Tommy McKnight, Dayton, Alabama

“Sometimes, you’ve gotta do the best you can with the equipment you’ve got.”
James Parton, Lebanon, Tennessee

“The toes you step on today may be the ass you’re kissing tomorrow, so watch how you treat people.”
Ralph Railey, Eufaula, Alabama

“Never let anyone else define who you are or tell you what you’re worth. You do that.”
Hal Littleton, Asheville, North Carolina

“People won’t always believe what you say, but they will always believe what you do.”
Vic Grout, Greer, South Carolina

“There’s many a slip between the cup and the lip.”
Boone Knox, Thomson, Georgia

“If it’s wrong, don’t do it.”
Juan Ybarra, Brownsville, Texas

“Don’t let your gas gauge get below a quarter of a tank.”
Oliver M. Hornsby, Natchez, Mississippi

“Once you stop dreamin’ you’re dead, kid.”
Franklin A. Talley, Okmulgee, Oklahoma

“The harder you work, the luckier you get.”
James Allen Braxton, Vienna, Georgia

“Be careful of the company you keep.”
John Clifford Kilgore, Sr., Stapleton, Georgia

“Be sure and marry a good provider.”
Marlow Reese, Montgomery, Alabama

“You never quit learning, Kate! I’m 80 years old and still learning.”
John Robert Aaron, Clarksdale, Mississippi

“Don’t go looking for trouble, because you’ll find it. There’s always someone bigger and badder than you out there.”
Stephen Parker, Sr., Madison, Tennessee

“Kid, you have to think like a cow.”
James “Hank” Adger, Gilliam, Louisiana

“Never be afraid to speak up, for yourself or for others.”
Roger Rankin, Georgetown, Kentucky

“Don’t ever be afraid to call me. No matter where you are or what time it is, I will come get you.”
Frank Stough, Hickory, North Carolina

“Go to church, do your best, be there.”
Phil Baggett, St. Louis, Missouri

“Be careful out there, and watch out for the idiots.”
Walter Boswell, Greenwood, Mississippi

“Always finish what you start, and be thankful for what you have!”
Henry Twiley, Atlanta, Georgia

“When things get to be too much, have a drink and trust in the good Lord.”
Jimmy Ray Bryant, Paragould, Arkansas

“Go outside.”
Dean Arnold, Memphis, Tennessee

“Always try to reason with a bully and walk away from a potential ass kicking. If this does not work, kick them in the shins and run to the barn.”
Howard C. Haynes, Nashville, Tennessee

“A woman’s job is to cook, clean, make babies—and do everything a man can do.”
Jim Goins, Hamilton, Ohio

“Through life’s greatest trials come God’s greatest blessings.”
Joe Moore, Jacksonville, Florida

“As we get older, people tend to make fun of us because we begin to forget things. For me, it’s great, because it means I can watch my favorite shows every day, and they’re just as good each time.”
Franklin Kennedy, Florence, Alabama

“Steady your wheel.”
James “Cap” Elliott, Charleston, South Carolina

My dad’s best advice came from what he did, not from what he said. I remember waking up every morning as a kid to find him sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee and reading the Bible.
Michael Calvert, Huntsville, Alabama

“Even little birds in the nest get along, and they poop on each other.”
Jim Rozier, Moncks Corner, South Carolina

“Always have cash, because credit cards can’t always help you if you’re in trouble.”
Barry Cannada, Jackson, Mississippi

“You fry fish you buy at the grocery. You grill fish that comes off your boat.”
Bob Gray, Mobile, Alabama

“If you want to look like the south end of a mule headed north, that’s your business.”
Mickey Avinger, Cross Anchor, South Carolina

“Never regret the choices you make in life. Never be sorry for what you did yesterday; it was what you wanted, what you chose. Accept that fact, and move forward.”
Dale Phelps, Lexington, Kentucky

“When someone tells you they’re going to do something, make sure to get it in writing.”
David Broom, Yazoo City, Mississippi

When I smashed my thumb with a hammer and was wincing in pain he said, “Well, means your pecker’s still growing.”
Maury Taylor, Matewan, West Virginia

“Nicole, you can’t make chicken salad out of chicken sh*t.”
Gary J. Beers, Montgomery, Alabama

“Don’t panic.”
Joe Ferguson, Mobile, Alabama

“Put others first and do one good deed a day, no matter how small.”
Jewel Simmons, Bogaloosa, Mississippi

“Growing old ain’t for sissies.”
Ernie Roberson, Charlotte, North Carolina

“Never give up.”
Jack West, Clarksville, Arkansas

“There’s freedom in responsibility.”
Ben Hagood, Charleston, South Carolina

“Be a friend and you will always have a friend.”
Haskell Brady, Banks County, Georgia

“Use it up, wear it out, make do and do without.”
Cleve Sparks, Carnesville, Georgia

On swinging a golf club and life in general: “Don’t overthink it.”
Stephen Dunstan, Raleigh, North Carolina

“Don’t work at a bank.” And I turned around and did just that!
Harvey Davis, Cropwell, Alabama

“Sweetheart, in 100 years, none of this will matter.”
C. Andrew Boor, Petersburg, West Virginia

“Son, don’t worry about what other people think of you.”
Ron Cobb, Tampa, Florida

“God takes care of the little birds, and he will take care of you.”
Jimmy Chapman, Asheville, North Carolina

“Love changes everything, but great laughter slides in a close second.”
Thomas H. Hamm, Jr., Birmingham, Alabama

“There are two things that no one can ever take from you: your education and your good name.”
Guy Sullaway, Missouri City, Texas

“Never quit a job until you have another one to go to.”
Ken Neal, Alexandria, Louisiana

“Figures lie and liars figure.”
Joe Lee Ledbetter, Travelers Rest, South Carolina

“Pain is only fear leaving your body.”
Robert Ginn, Cedartown, Georgia

“How in the world could you expect to make anyone else happy when you have no idea what even makes you happy?”
Roger Lee Berry, Central City, Kentucky

“This too shall pass.”
Don Preston, Nashville, Tennessee

Regarding proper form while making precise cuts on a table saw: “You have to hold your mouth right.”
Paul Hicks, Jackson, South Carolina

“Always be nice to people until they force you to do otherwise. In other words, you catch more flies with honey.”
Jerry Peele, Laurinburg, North Carolina

“Don’t let the turkeys get you down!”
James Sherry Nist, Germantown, Maryland

“Only the truth. Always and only the truth.”
Dr. N.R. Nichols, III, Lookout Mountain, Tennessee

“Remember who you are.”
Price “Spanky” McLean, Moultrie, Georgia

“There are two theories to arguing with your momma, and neither works!”
Gerald “Butch” Aldridge, Augusta, Georgia

“No matter what happens, you have to keep moving forward.”
Bobby Harrell, Yemassee, South Carolina

“When in doubt, don’t.”
Barry Thomas, Chattanooga, Tennessee

“When you are naming your dog, keep it short, one syllable. Something you can yell in the field.”
F.W. Darracott, III, Johnston, South Carolina

“Go with the flow, baby!”
Marion A. “Bucky” Byram, Savannah, Tennessee

“Be kind to strangers.”
Dub Mathews, Delta, Colorado

“Get your education. Go to college. Don’t depend on a man to take care of you.”
Lester “Red” Moody, Bogalusa, Louisiana

“You can’t call a dog and kiss it, too.”
David Baird, Richmond, Kentucky

“Keep your head down and keep going.”
Robert T. “Ty” Cook, Sr., New Orleans, Louisiana

“Never half-ass any job, no matter how big or small. It is a reflection of your character.”
Carlos Herrera, Bossier City, Louisiana

“If you don’t know how to do something, pick up a book and read about it.”
Woody Mitchell, Flemingsburg, Kentucky

“Blow your nose when you cross the Alabama/Georgia state line.”
Herman House, Gadsden, Alabama

“Always remember where you came from. When you forget where you came from, you’ve lost a sense of yourself.”
Bruce Winborn, Savannah, Tennessee

“Get yourself a truck. You’ll always have work.”
Kirby Jantz, Guthrie, Oklahoma

“Be good.”
Rufus McNair, Wrens, Georgia

“Never burn your bridges.”
Phil Lantrip, Amory, Mississippi

“Decide what you’re gonna do and go on and do it.”
Gregg Beck, Pensacola, Florida